What not to cook when you have dinner guests-unless you wish them dead.

This is a fairly simple dish to make. I like to call it apple surprise, because the surprise is that there are no apples in it.

Ingredients needed:

1 succulent wild chicken (no innards)
3 ripened tomatoes
2 abhorrent rotten aubergines
5 table spoons of lemon juice
3 tsps of chili
3 tsps of curry powder
a dash of salt
a dash of pepper
4 shots of sambuca
1 bacon sandwich

Stuffing: 2 kgs of salt, 3dl creme fraiche, anchovies and walnuts.

Instructions:
*Pre-heat the oven to 220*c.
*Wash the vegtables, then, after cutting them into halves, chuck them in a blender along with the lemon juice and the various spices.
*Once this has been made into a paste (you may need to add a little water while you are blending to get things going) then rub the paste all over the wild chicken’s belly and wings.
*Mix the stuffing together and stuff the carcass.
*Have the shots of sambuca.
*Stick the chicken in the oven in a fireproof dish and cook for 2 hours.

Tips
*Potatoes are good as a side dish.
*You do not need to wait for the chicken to be golden brown to know that it is ready-you will smell the rotten aubergines before then.
*If you are having extra special guests over for dinner and you wish the stuffing to curdle, i suggest adding vinegar.
*Once the shots of sambuca have kicked in you wont really give a shit about what the guests think anyway, and also it will have significantly reduced your own appetite.
-if you do get hungry, then that is what the bacon sandwich is for.

Bon Appetite!
Master chef Probable Sushi.