Life’s Shitty Little Surprises

* Hayfever induced skin rash.

* When you drink out of a can of coke that someone else has put their cigarette butt in.

* When you think you’re smart by bringing the EXACT change for a bus ticket but the bus fare has gone up and no one has told you.

* When someone decides that THEIR idea for your wedding dress, wedding cake…and anything else connected with your wedding is much MUCH better than your ideas, and takes the liberty to invite strangers and cancel all the things you had arranged.

* When it’s raining and a car drives past that puddle just a little too fast (hell, he sped up!) and you end up soaked head to toe because you couldn’t get out of the way in time.

* Sitting next to Mr. Stinky on the train…Then the train breaks down…for 3 hours.

* Little lambs bleeting softly only to be slaughtered unexpectedly.

* When you forget to bring a fork to work with you to eat your lunch with, and have to substitute it with a plastic knife that cuts the edge of your mouth.

* When someone forgets to tell you that they saw your car being towed, and you are late for a meeting.

* Paper cuts in strange places that refuse to heal.

* When your therapist calls you someone elses name and admits he hasnt been listening because he’s mentally making a shopping list.

* When your fiance does the same 20 minutes later.

Do you realise that a 1/7th of your life consists of
Mondays? -Probable Sushi